I don't know how many of you know this, but Elliot is not an only child. In the traditional sense he is, but when you've got two mommies, traditional is kind of out the window... am I wrong?
Elliot has siblings all over the world: Australia, Denmark, Norway and Portland, Oregon. Six siblings in total, with a new one on the way. We know about these little cuties because we connected with their moms on The Donor Sibling Registry shortly before Elliot was born. Subsequently, we formed a private Facebook group where we share pics and updates on the kids.
Initially, we were cautious because we didn't know these people, and had all kinds of weird fantasies about who they were and how they were going to encroach on our lives (think beggars at the front door). Well... I had the fantasies, not sure about Leslie. However, as it turns out my worries were ungrounded. Among us are financial planners, accomplished artists, theater directors and scientists. We are a group of independent, successful women whose kids are related through our donor. It's fair to say that over the past two years, we have formed a global family: We were thrilled when Elliot's youngest brother was born, and are anxiously awaiting his newest sister.
Recently, one of our super-smart moms figured out who our donor is. This news blew our minds, but in a good way. Out of respect for the donor and his privacy, I am not going to reveal any details; however, we were elated to learn that he is a successful, bright young man with a truly awesome family. He hails from a large Irish clan, with a father who is an ivy-league grad and a grandfather whose professional contributions helped make their city a safer, better place. We were also elated to learn they are democrats ;-)
The craziest is that out of all the children, Elliot probably most resembles his donor. Yes, he looks like me, but he looks even more like him. So seeing the donor's childhood pictures on a relative's Instagram, as well as some adult ones, was pretty amazing and emotional. Emotional in a great, inexplicable way.
Knowing the donor is a game-changer for me personally. As one of the other moms said, "It feels less like part of V. came out of a black box." I totally agree with this.
I'm not gonna lie, the thought of contacting him has crossed my mind, but that's Elliot's decision.
And this brings me to another point: how to even explain all of this to Elliot? I have no idea, but I'll let you know when I get there.